Kindness: Unnatural yet Indispensable

For the North Huron Citizen, Nov.14 2025

“To cultivate kindness,” said Samuel Johnson, “is a valuable part of the business of life.” But why be kind? Much of modern culture seems fraught with conflict, especially in the political sphere. Rival parties attack and hurl accusations at their opponents. Of course, the media crave conflict: internet moguls seek to capture your attention to sell advertising dollars – and what attracts onlookers more than a juicy public dogfight?! Kindness, unfortunately, does not sell newspapers.

So, why be kind in a world that seems addicted to hostility and seeking power over others? Christians understand that kindness is right at the core of the 9-fold “fruit of the Spirit” in Galatians 5 (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control). But why, and also how, should we be more kind?

First, we are called to be kind because God our Heavenly Father is kind. Jesus taught, “But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil.” (Luke 6:35)

Some might object that a popular stereotype pictures God as a stern bearded old man in the sky, watching our every move as if trying to catch us in some wrongdoing. But this is a twisting of the way God has revealed Himself in Scripture. It harkens more to pagan conceptions of the divine, such as the Greek god Zeus or the Norse gods Odin or Thor. Granted, there is an aspect to the Biblical God that calls us to account, with consequences for rebels. The Apostle Paul articulates this: “Note then the kindness and the severity of God: severity toward those who have fallen, but God’s kindness to you, provided you continue in his kindness. Otherwise you too will be cut off.”

But the dominant note in the New Testament is of God’s lovingkindness expressed to sinners who turn to Him for help. Paul also wrote of “the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience” - such that “God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance.” (Romans 2:4) He notes God has saved us (who trust in Christ) “so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus”. (Ephesians 2:7)

So the caricature of God as some kind of grouchy grinch is a warped misconstruing of Biblical truth.

Second, we can be kind because God is not only kind in His essential nature, He has expressed His kindness to us when we follow Jesus – forgiving our sins, sending His Holy Spirit to indwell us, and preparing an eternal home for us in heaven. The Apostle Paul encourages us, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32) And, “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience…” It is because we ourselves experience being “chosen” and “beloved” by God that we are graciously empowered to show kindness to others. We don’t have to compete and fight with others to try to win some degree of approval or significance.

A third reason to be kind is that it brings its own health benefits. In the Baltimore Experience Corps trial, adults age 60 and older were randomly assigned to either volunteer at elementary schools or be put on a waiting list. The volunteers spent at least 15 hours a week tutoring underprivileged kids. After two years, the researchers found that the volunteers had measurable changes in their brain health. One of the researchers said, "They didn't experience declines in memory and executive function like we saw in our control participants. And there were even changes in brain volume in areas of the brain that support these different cognitive processes.” Volunteers were also more physically active, "which is important for maintaining both cognitive and physical health as folks age.”

A fourth reason to be kind is that life is less about competition than it is about community. Kindness promotes community, whereas hostility pits us against others and ruptures society. Part of the “Greatest Commandment” is to “Love your neighbour as yourself.” (Matthew 22:36ff) Jesus’ particular command to His followers is, “Love one another” - that implies community, not competition. (John 13:34f, 15:12) 

The Pierre de Coubertin International Fair Play Trophy is named for the founder of the modern Olympic Games, and it has been awarded annually to people in sports who have demonstrated nobility of spirit. The first trophy went to an Italian bobsledder named Eugenio Monti: in the two-man bobsled event at the 1964 Innsbruck Olympics, Monti was the leader after his final run. The only one given a chance to beat him was Tony Nash of Great Britain. As Nash and his teammate got ready for their final run, they discovered that a critical bolt on their sled had snapped at the last moment. Monti was informed of the problem and immediately took the corresponding bolt from his own sled and sent it up to Nash. Nash fixed his sled, then proceeded to come hurtling down the course to set a record and won the gold medal!

Nash may have won the competition – but Monti won in terms of character, cooperation, and fostering community in a spirit of kindness and fair play.

Lastly, in an increasingly automated and ‘smart’ AI-interwoven culture, we can be kind because it is a quintessential aspect of our humanity. David became king of all Israel and kicked off its ‘Golden Age’, yet he nevertheless made a point of showing kindness to his dear friend Jonathan’s surviving son, a cripple named Mephibosheth, inviting him to always eat at the king’s table. (2 Samuel 9) During the empire of the Persians, Mordecai took into his home the orphaned daughter of his uncle, who as Queen Esther became instrumental in saving her people from genocide.

Mamie Adams always went to a branch post office in her town because the postal employees there were friendly. She went there to buy stamps just before Christmas one year and the lines were particularly long. Someone pointed out that there was no need to wait in line because there was a stamp machine in the lobby. “I know," said Mamie, 'but the machine won't ask me about my arthritis.” Machines can be useful, but it takes a person to be caring and kind!

In short, showing kindness reveals something about God’s essential nature to those around us, as we ourselves have been blessed to experience His own kindness toward us in Christ. As Max Lucado put it, “I choose kindness... I will be kind to the poor, for they are alone. Kind to the rich, for they are afraid. And kind to the unkind, for such is how God has treated me.”

Obedience may not be FUN, but it's FUNctional

"From the Minister's Study" Column, Sept.5/25 North Huron Citizen

Obedience is usually not fun – instead it can be very hard, having to make ourselves do what we may not want to do. Our selfish nature reacts at being told what to do. “We wants what we wants when we wants it!”

So, left to ourselves, we may become selfish, narcissistic, even abusive. After all, abuse is about power and control, taking advantage of others, perhaps manipulating them whether by falsehood or by force. We are polluted by selfish sin, impure, broken in our relationships. All have sinned and fall short of God’s glory. (Romans 3:23)

It's hard to submit to authority and do as we're told, to obey. But as everyone knows, the most important thing in Christianity is to be obedient, right? To keep the law – obey 100% and you'll be blessed, right? Uh - no; that would be Prosperity Gospel 101.

No? Then what is the most important thing in Christianity?

God commanded in Deuteronomy 6:4f, what’s known as the very famous “Shema” for Jews – “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” How much of our heart etc? All. Not just 30%, or 75%, or 95%... All!

Jesus focused on this when asked what was the most important commandment. “And he said to him, ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 22:37-40) Note Jesus connects or associates loving others with loving God – because God commands us to love others. We can't love God yet hate our neighbour at the same time (1Jn. 4:20), because if we really love God we will obey Him: Jesus said, “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word…” (Jn. 14:23f) If we love God, we will come to want what God wants, get on board with His agenda and priorities – get our jollies out of seeing God's caring Kingdom-community become lived out on earth as it is in heaven. (Recall opening lines of The Lord’s Prayer.) In fact Jesus went so far as to say pointedly: “This is My command – that you love one another.” (John 15:17, emphasis added)

There is a problem, though: our selfish pride gets in the way! How can we become better at loving others??!

There is a clue buried in 1Peter 1:22, which says: “Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart.” Let’s unpack that.

Years ago there was an old marketing slogan: “Butter eaters make better lovers.” Catchy, memorable even, but not necessarily based on evidence. Does eating butter make you a better lover? No! Butter needs to go with something - bread, bun, popcorn… Butter by itself doesn’t make a satisfying meal (blechh!). When we're just thinking of our self, it’s “yuck”. We need to learn to get out of ourself, “it’s not about me”.

What truly makes better lovers? If not butter, what will help us become better at loving? Back to 1 Peter 1:22; note especially the connecting words “by” and “so that”. How do we purify our souls? By “obeying the truth”. 

To what end? So that we “have a sincere love for each other”. The word “sincere” means originally ‘without wax’ (to conceal cracks); by extension – whole, unpolluted, purified.

So, what is the function of obedience Peter is getting at? Is obedience simply an end in itself? More than just that – it's the key to becoming less selfish. Obeying God’s way forces us to do what we may not really want to do, trains us in discipline, it requires a little “death to self”. This ties in directly with another key teaching of Jesus: we cannot be His disciple unless – what? We deny our self, take up our cross daily, and follow (obey) Him. (Luke 9:23) 

In Psalm 32:9, God urges the Israelites to accept His instruction without resisting like a horse or mule that won't come without bit and bridle. On the farm, we have been rehabilitating a young pig someone brought us that fell off a stock truck, sustaining a broken jaw and hind leg in the process. “Babe” the pig in the morning fights the lead as I take her out to her pen, back and forth and sideways, straining against it on her hind legs. But in the evening, going back into the barn and her food dish there, no leash is required: she runs straight as an arrow into the barn for her supper. She is completely on board with the Master's will, she obediently identifies with my purpose. 

Elisabeth Elliot tells the story of when she and her brother Tom were small children. Their mother would let Tom play with paper bags that she had saved as long as he put them away afterwards. One day she walked into the kitchen to find them strewn all over the floor.

Tom was in another room at the piano with his father singing hymns. When their mother called him to the kitchen to tidy up, he protested, "But Mum, I want to sing ‘Jesus loves me, this I know’."

His father, seated next to him, backed up the boy’s mother by saying: “It's no good singing God's praise if you're disobedient. To obey is better than sacrifice."

To recap… do “butter eaters make better lovers”? NO! What makes a better lover? Obedience. It’s the training ground for truly loving God and others. Obedience may not be FUN, but it's FUNctional.

Grievances Require a Huge Gulp

Column for The North Huron Citizen, "From the Minister's Study" - July 18, 2025

            Which is harder to swallow: an entire person – or a grievance?

            People wonder, in the Biblical story of Jonah, how a “great fish” could swallow a prophet then spit him up again conveniently on shore nearer his appointed destination to continue his mission. (Jonah 1:17, 2:10) But the main point of the story is not the bite size or cavernous innards of a submarine creature, but the reluctant prophet’s own inner resistance to forgive his enemies. Let me explain.

            When God first tells Jonah to go preach against Nineveh, the capital of the Assyrian Empire, Jonah does not obey; instead he heads in the opposite direction as far as he can, boarding a ship to sail to a far distant port. He obviously considered Nineveh not worthy of a warning. What was so bad about Assyria that might make an Israelite hesitant to help its people?

            Nineveh’s king eventually calls on his countrymen to give up their “evil ways and violence” (3:8). Another prophet, Nahum, provides more detail: Nineveh’s sins included plotting evil against the Lord, cruelty and plundering in war, prostitution and witchcraft, and commercial exploitation. Assyria was one of the world’s first great organized empires, so had figured out how to use its power and resources to threaten, intimidate, and brutally dominate others.

            Can you relate? How do you feel toward others that rip you off, or treat you unfairly? What’s your attitude toward those that use power or status or speech to put you down, make you feel demeaned? Do you wish them well? Hardly! That’s just not natural. Far easier for us to want to see them get their “just desserts”, to wish to see the downfall of those who’ve put us down.

            Eventually God gets Jonah’s attention, saving his life after an insurmountable storm at sea. Jonah relents, goes and preaches to Nineveh briefly, then takes a seat outside the city to await its promised destruction. But he’s disappointed. Nineveh’s king proclaims a period of repentance and fasting. As a result - “When God saw what they did and how they turned from their evil ways, he had compassion and did not bring upon them the destruction he had threatened.” (Jonah 3:10)

            How does Jonah feel in response? Greatly displeased and angry – to the point of asking God to end his life because “it is better for me to die than to live” (4:4). The Lord replies, “Have you any right to be angry?”

            But that’s exactly how we feel when our enemies have done us wrong, have hurt us deeply. “I have a right to be upset! I want them to suffer just like they’ve hurt me.”

            Scale it down for a moment from the Evil Oppressive Empire and make it personal. Who might you find it hardest to forgive? Can you honestly pray for God’s mercy to be shown to them? My Dad and uncles fought in World War II, one uncle in the RCAF was killed in France in January 1945 returning from a mission. Would I want to see Hitler in heaven? (supposing, theoretically, in his dying moments in that bunker, he had sincerely repented) What about Josef Stalin, or Mao Tse-Tung, responsible for the deaths of millions? Some of the most despicable villainous criminals have repented and turned to Jesus in prison; would I want God to show mercy to them, after the horrible deeds they’ve committed?

            A third juncture in the Jonah story highlights how hard it is for him to give up his grievances. God provides a leafy vine to provide shade for Jonah and ease his discomfort, which makes Jonah very happy (4:6). But a worm withers the vine, and again the blazing sun and scorching wind make Jonah wish he were dead. Once more God asks him, “Do you have a right to be angry (about the vine)?” Jonah whines that he does; but God points out He actually has a right to be concerned about the thousands of people in Nineveh, whereas Jonah had nothing at all invested in the vine. Throughout the story, God’s character is highlighted as Jonah describes it in 4:2 (and is echoed throughout the Old Testament): “a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity.”

            Don’t be waylaid by a whale; don’t become flabbergasted by a fish! The point of the story of Jonah is not whether Nessie had a cousin lurking deep in the Mediterranean. The point is startlingly personal: would we be willing to do whatever it takes for even our enemies to be forgiven? Or would we be only to happy to stand apart and watch them be damned?

            Which brings us right to the cross of Jesus. He was the only perfectly innocent person that ever lived; He was simultaneously God in-the-flesh, so had every right to invoke judgment on His enemies. But rather, He went to the cross, being whipped and beaten and tortured to death in their stead, so they could be forgiven. “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us… For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!” (Romans 5:8,10) As sinners, we were God’s “enemies”... The cross shows us just how far God’s compassion and grace and abounding love is willing to go to save those who would reject Him.

            God, help me to become willing to have the same attitude toward those who’ve hurt me, that Jesus had toward sinner-enemies like me! To swallow my grievances, that I might taste Your grace.

Electing Number One

 For The Citizen column “From the Minister’s Study” - May 2, 2025

            The playoffs are on – as numerous hockey teams shoot and shove and score in an attempt to become Number One in the league, and take home the coveted Stanley Cup for this year. Will it be a Canadian team, perhaps? Who are you cheering for?

            Meanwhile, Canadians have gone to the polls to choose a new federal government. Unlike our neighbours to the south, we do not elect a ‘president’ directly; instead, we vote for a local party representative, and the prime minister is decided indirectly based on the most number of seats won by the respective parties. Nevertheless, an election is basically about choosing who will form the ruling party, and thus determine our most important political leader. Which horse in this race are you backing? A ballot forces us to choose just one option.

            Life is about making choices. Playoffs select a single champion team. Elections choose a single ultimate political leader. Each day brings its own decisions as to the choices we make, all the way from what we will wear or eat to major ones like whom to marry or which house to buy. Our choices reveal our priorities, what’s most important to us, to which option we attach the most value.

            “Worship” is not a term consigned solely to remain within the walls of religious establishments; the term comes from “worth-ship”, meaning what we deem as having the highest or supreme value. Thus our whole life, insofar as it consists of making choices based on our values, has to do with worship. What we treasure, what we prize most highly, will influence what we do, what we give our attention to, how we spend our time, the way we allocate our resources.

            As Jordan Peterson observes in his book We Who Wrestle with God: “Something is inevitably imitated, celebrated, and even worshipped, no matter which way we turn; no matter whether we engage in an ultimately counterproductive selfishness or a productive reciprocal generosity. One thing or another is being elevated to the highest place, which is an act always necessary before attentional resources can be allocated and forward movement initiated. To attend to one thing, or to do one thing, is to sacrifice everything else that could have instead been noticed or done. To prioritize is to sacrifice, and to sacrifice properly is to atone.”

            Life is short. We can’t “do it all”. We sacrifice certain options in favour of doing what’s more important, more valuable (‘worth-shipped’) to us in the long run. Be it scrolling Facebook, watching the hockey game, or choosing to write an encouraging email to a family member or friend who’s going through a tough time – we are constantly making ‘elections’ based on what we hold most precious and worthwhile.

            The Bible advises us to choose carefully what we elect to take the highest place in our lives. Arriving at Sinai, Moses had led a rag-tag multitude of former slaves out into the wilderness to be congealed together somehow into a functional, flourishing society. The first couple of the Ten Commandments emphasized the need to place God first in our scheme of values. “I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the LORD your God am a jealous God…” (Exodus 20:2–5)

            The Lord knows that when we place any lesser idol at the pinnacle of our system of values, we are not only dishonouring our Creator, we are also setting ourselves up for disappointment – because no other idol will allow us to ultimately flourish. His “jealousy” for our worship is actually for our good, to protect us from the abuse, manipulation, and extortion lesser gods would exact from us.

            This exclusive claim of God upon our devotion is summarized in the traditional “Shema” memorized by Israelites: “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” (Deuteronomy 6:4–5) That word “all” is significant: if I say I have eaten “all” the muffin, no one would expect to have some piece left over!

            The Sadducees and Pharisees were hostile toward Jesus and His teaching, and sought to trap Him in His words on several occasions. Once one of them, a legal expert, tested Him on this matter of what’s most important, asking: “Which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied using the famous “Shema” – “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” Jesus noted, “This is the great and first commandment.” (Matthew 22:37–38) In one regard, He wasn’t telling them something they didn’t already know; but, now, they were hearing it emphasized directly from God Incarnate, the Son of God Himself.

            Jesus was not given to insisting people bow down to Him; when people realized He was the Messiah and started announcing it, He was more inclined to hush them than to encourage the news to be broadcast. Yet, for His disciples, He did solicit their allegiance and devotion, calling them to “Follow Me”. Discipleship is ‘followership’ and entails sacrifices – choosing to forego other options so we can do what the Lord wants. To follow Jesus requires putting Him first. He insisted, “And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name’s sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life.” (Matthew 19:29) That entails careful weighing of our priorities.

            Tradition tells us the Apostle John outlived the other original disciples, who were martyred for their conviction Jesus had risen from the dead. He survived torture and was exiled to a deserted island, Patmos. His first letter to churches of the time concludes with a poignant, simple caution, which stands out in its context: “Dear children, keep yourselves from idols.” (1John 5:21) Do our choices show we are free from idols? What do our actions reveal we are electing as Number One?

Enriched by Those Hard Up in El Salvador

For The Citizen column “From the Minister’s Study” March 14, 2025

   From February 8-16 it was my privilege to take part in a Shelter Canada project in El Salvador building 12 houses! This was part of a larger 3-week commitment by Wingham-area teams headed by Ed & Brenda Stein and Doug Kuyvenhoven; generous donors gave enough to build over 50 houses! (Materials for each house cost approximately $3800.)

   It was the privilege of us who went to witness in person the gratefulness each family, and indeed the entire community, expressed upon construction of their new homes – safe from the elements, and from intruders because they could be securely locked. One farm labourer expressed how difficult it would be to save up enough for just a couple of sheets of steel, let alone an entire house! 

   We learned to admire the hard-working Salvadorans, many of them neighbouring volunteers, who have to cope with extremely challenging farming conditions on steep hillsides. They pitched in energetically to dig the holes for the foundation, and to assemble the steel structure including the sharp-edged roof. The local Shelter employees (especially translators and foremen) treated us with respect and as friends, eagerly showing us how to carry out necessary tasks. 

   We appreciated the prayers of those back home for our safety. About half of each day's journeying (an hour in the morning and again at night) consisted of hanging on to the bars in the back of a pickup truck as it bounced slowly along a rocky uneven road along a steep mountainside, around hairpin turns with zero shoulder where one stared down into deep gorges.

   We had devotions as a group at the start of each day. One morning I shared from Isaiah 58:11-12, which seemed to be particularly applicable in the sunny hot conditions of El Salvador: "The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame… Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings."

   We are thankful for all those who partnered with us, whether by praying or donating, in repairing buildings with broken walls and providing secure dwellings for disadvantaged folks in a sun-scorched land! 

   An earlier team (February 1-9) included half a dozen teens from Huron Chapel EMC in Auburn. This team managed to engage other El Salvadoran youth in friendly competitive soccer matches some evenings. Since their return, several have remarked how Shelter Canada was a life-changing experience for them. One teenage girl from the Auburn area, Emily Datema, shares these memories…

   “One thing that stuck out to me the most was the first family we built a house for… a 40 year old father (his name was José) who had 3 kids: Elias is 10, Sarita (Sarah) is 7 and David is 3. José’s wife left him 8 months before (most of the time it's the father who walks away and leaves the mother with the kids) and he had a job bricklaying, so his parents often took care of the kids. When we got there they met us at the end of their driveway and Sarita the little girl came running with a smile on her face and hugged us; she noticed I had a soccer ball, took it right from my hands and ran away. I wondered if I would ever get it back! I didn't see it for most of the morning while I helped build the house. 

   “At first the kids stayed back and were all shy, but not Sarah. She came and gave me something to drink like 4 times. One time she brought me a bottle and said a whole lot of Spanish to me while I stood there like, “Gracias, thanks for the water,” and she watched me. The translator walked over and I asked what she was trying to say to me. Turns out the water was not for me, she was asking me to open the lid for her! She just laughed and got another bottle. 

   “I found the soccer ball hiding under a towel in a corner; I think she thought it was a gift for her. So I grabbed it and tried to ask and signaled with my hands to play soccer with her and her brothers. They agreed right away… When we got too hot to play and we sat down for some water, Sarita came over and said in Spanish, “You know you're not done playing with me” – so we sat in the shade and did a few colouring pages together while she chats away in Spanish. 

   “When we sat down for lunch she sat beside me and asked if I was gonna play with her again. We played some more soccer after lunch, then we helped build the second house, which was for José’s parents. Before this they had all lived together in a small mud and brick house. Gloria and I were drilling holes in the door stoppers and Sarah was at my side again chatting away, and she wanted to do it herself. And so I held the drill with one hand and she helped me drill the rest. She stayed at my side the whole time. She held screws for me and said lots of Spanish. We got a picture together… This little girl really touched me, and even with all she had gone through as a kid, she was so happy and full of joy and energy. I loved playing with her and I hope I made a lasting memory for her.

   “One more thing that stuck out to me was how friendly everyone was and welcoming, and generous when they had almost nothing.”

   Thanks Emily for sharing this! In North America we have much we take for granted, which may not be obvious until we visit less-developed areas like parts of El Salvador. Yet there we also discover from those who don’t have much materially, that they can enrich us by their gifts of friendship and partnership in both work and play. Indeed the Lord “will satisfy your needs” in ways that are more than simply material.